Venus-Pluto aspects are intense. In fact, these are some of the most difficult aspects to have in relationships.

We all crave intimacy, but people with Venus-Pluto aspects confuse power, control, or obsession with intimacy and love. It’s hard for them to figure out what is fulfilling versus what is painful. Sometimes, pleasure and pain are intrinsically linked.

Although these Venus-Pluto aspects are all a bit extreme, they’re also transformative. If you’re willing to put in the work, your Venus-Pluto aspects can truly change your life and help you to create the kind of intimate, loving relationships you desire.

Venus Conjunct Pluto

Venus conjunct Pluto in the natal chart means that you are naturally intense in love. You experience a lot of instant attraction when you’re single and generally enter into karmic relationships.

You might feel like your relationships are unusually powerful. Venus conjunct Pluto is all about power and control. This can be a positive factor, but your partnerships also have the potential to end badly if control becomes the driving force.

Look to your Venus sign and learn about the qualities, but then realize that all of these attributes are modified by Pluto. With Venus conjunct Pluto, your Venus sign becomes more intense, passionate, and deep, but it can also be more jealous, possessive, or obsessive.

Venus conjunct Pluto indicates that it’s easy for you to fall into toxic relationships. In fact, it can be quite difficult for you to find a relationship with a balanced amount of power on each side.

You find it easy to attract partners and may not be single very often, unless by choice. However, you also attract partners who have a darker nature. You either control others or allow yourself to be controlled.

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In life, not only in relationships, you are attracted to mystery and seduction. The darker side of things is intriguing because of Venus conjunct Pluto.

Venus conjunct Pluto can lead to destructive, toxic relationships if you have other difficult elements in your chart. The lower your self-esteem, the more likely you are to stay in a harmful partnership.

At the extremes, Venus conjunct Pluto means that you may become a victim of betrayal or abuse. This can be a truly difficult aspect, depending on the signs and house.

However, you’re also drawn to people with a dark side, including those with addictions, a painful childhood, trauma, mental illness, or abusive behaviors. How this plays out will depend on the sign and house that Venus conjunct Pluto is in.

In general, you are drawn to those who seem unlovable by the outside world. It is the power imbalance that fuels you, although you aren’t necessarily seeking power for yourself.

It’s hard for you to distinguish between pain and pleasure. You may chase pain because you think that it will bring you the intimacy you crave, then you feel let down when this believe is revealed to be false. 

Ultimately with Venus conjunct Pluto, you simply want intimacy and loyalty. These qualities are difficult for you to find because of your relationship methods. Most of your partnerships feel vaguely dark, intense, or obsessive, and you just don’t know how to turn a relationship into what you desire while maintaining the intensity.

You have transformative relationships, for good or for bad. To transmute Venus conjunct Pluto and use this aspect for its highest good, you must first develop a sense of self.

Once you have self-worth, you will start to attract partners who transform you in a positive way. In fact, Pluto conjunct Venus can be truly transformative like nothing other placement.

Eventually, you will transform yourself through relationships. Keep in mind that this takes a lot of work. You will need to continuously say no to relationships if you’re not getting what you deserve. 

Once you do find a partner who you feel you can trust, there will still be some mud to slog through. Venus conjunct Pluto never disappears, but the lessons will be less cruel and more uplifting. This is when you will be transformed for good.

Venus conjunct Pluto means that you have the potential to transform yourself through love. This can be self-love as well as romantic.

Venus Trine Pluto

Venus trine Pluto is a much easier aspect than the conjunction, but it can also create a variety of issues. After all, almost no aspect with Pluto is truly easy.

With Venus trine Pluto, you are drawn to intense relationships naturally. You know when you feel it for someone and you’re all in. You probably experience a lot of love at first sight.

Around others, you appear powerful and confident about yourself. This creates a magnetic aura that attracts those who enjoy basking in the glow of power. People are naturally drawn to you.

You probably love the attention that you get because of this Venus trine Pluto placement. Even though it’s an easier placement, you can still go too far when you’re enjoying your natural power. You’d like to have the upper hand, when possible.

You aren’t superficial in love. Venus by itself can indicate superficiality, but Venus trine Pluto creates a deeper, more intense nature in relationships.

Unless you have other aspects that dilute it, Venus trine Pluto usually means that you’re very sexual. Most sexual experiences feel natural to you, and the dynamics of power and control don’t scare you.

The best part of Venus trine Pluto is that you’re naturally growing throughout your life. This mainly happens through being in relationships. You’re always questioning things, always digging deeper, and continuously figuring out what love means to you. This isn’t as painful as some of the other aspects, but is simply a natural part of your existence.

Venus trine Pluto is a lovely aspect because you reap all of the benefits of the transformative nature of Pluto without as much of the pain. You may still feel obsession or encounter control issues, but these problems are easier to work through.

Venus Sextile Pluto

With Venus sextile Pluto, you have the opportunity to transform yourself through relationships. Although you are naturally attracted to transformational relationships, whether they are happy or painful, you must seize these opportunities and do the work in order to morph into the highest version of yourself.

You probably feel quite intensely with Venus sextile Pluto. Love and relationships are really important to you. Your partnerships are never without a degree of intensity.

However, with the Venus sextile Pluto aspect, you can simply ignore these qualities if you wish. Your soul wants to transform through relationships, but whether or not this happens is up to you.

To properly utilize Venus sextile Pluto, you should first work on your inner being and find your sense of self, then begin to define what a relationship means to you and what you would like to gain from love.

Venus Opposition Pluto

With the Venus opposition Pluto aspect, you experience instant attraction. Your relationships are extremely intense right from the start.

Once you’re in a relationship, you then deal with manipulation and control. In fact, you typically feel powerless in relationships, so you must turn to manipulation to get what you need.

It’s easy with Venus opposition Pluto for you to get caught up in trying to make things “appear” a certain way. You may ignore what’s truly going on in the relationship.

Venus opposition Pluto means that you want an air of beauty, so you pretend that there is no darkness underneath. This is ultimately because you don’t respect yourself enough to set boundaries and stop putting up with the control or anger from your partner. You believe that the relationship appearing perfect is the best you can get.

Power struggles are common in your relationships if you have the Venus opposition Pluto aspect. You may feel that you have to give up your personal power in order to actually have a relationship. You respond with manipulation or passive-aggressive tactics because this is the only way you can regain a semblance of control.

You probably feel that others don’t actually love you. In order to feel something like love, you must coerce others to show appreciation. Love and power are confused in the Venus opposition Pluto relationship. You’re not sure if someone having power over you means that they love you, or if you love them.

With the Venus opposition Pluto aspect in your natal chart, you actually meet the darker side of yourself in relationships. This shadow self shows up in your partners, however it actually reflects what lives inside you. Relationships are a good way to work through your inner demons, but you may start to see your partner as a representative of you rather than a separate individual.

It can feel almost impossible to separate from a partner. This is because you begin to see them as an extension of you, so no matter how hard it gets, you feel that you would be losing a piece of yourself should the relationship end.

You simultaneously have a fear of being dissolved through relationships. With Venus opposition Pluto, you see your relationships as a reflection of yourself, so it’s easy to forget where you end and your partner begins. This can cause you to disrespect yourself in relationship.

It’s important that you learn to stop letting others manipulate you. You’re always at the risk of being taken advantage of. In extreme cases, this can result in physical or sexual violence, so it’s essential that you learn to set clear boundaries.

With Venus opposition Pluto, the most important lesson is to figure out that your partner is separate from you own core self. You must develop a stronger sense of self in order to see this.

The first step is to become less concerned with how you appear and what your relationship looks like. Focus more on what’s actually underneath. What is the relationship truly made of? What do you truly want out of love?

As you work on your inner child and sense of self, you will begin to answer these questions for yourself, instead of answering in a way that makes your relationship look ideal.

Venus Square Pluto

At its core, Venus square Pluto simply means that love hurts. This is a difficult aspect to have in your birth chart.

This doesn’t mean that it’s impossible to deal with. In fact, Venus square Pluto can be transmuted. It’s possible to have a truly beautiful relationship when you come out on the other side! This simply takes a lot of work.

You are attracted to “bad” types, whatever that means for you. This is because you mistake power and control for intimacy. It’s difficult for you to tell the difference between obsession and love.

Venus square Pluto means that you don’t know how to get your needs met in a relationship. You simply haven’t learned the skills that you need to adequately express yourself.

This Venus square Pluto aspect creates a feeling of being perpetually stuck. You are torn in between the sweetness of Venus and the fear and control of Pluto.

In a relationship, manipulation may be your defense mechanism of choice. You probably don’t feel secure in relationships very often. You may feel ashamed because you have basic needs. Instead of asking for what you need, you manipulate your partner to try and gain it. This doesn’t often work and is actually a method of self-sabotage.

You simply don’t know how to get your needs met; you may not even know what you need. It’s difficult for you to say what you mean or to even figure it out for yourself. Of course, this is where you must begin the Venus square Pluto work.

Vulnerability is difficult for you. You feel vulnerable almost all of the time in relationships, even though you also desire intense, deep emotions. You get extremely defensive at the first sign of a slight because it’s so difficult for you to reveal these parts of yourself.

With Venus square Pluto, you really just crave intimacy, but you don’t even know what this means. You were born without the basic skills to have a happy and successful relationship, so these are things you need to develop now.

Your relationships are black or white. Venus square Pluto means that you might love then hate, or swing back and forth quite rapidly. You can be controlling or paranoid with your partner. Sometimes these fears are warranted, based on the characters you attract, but it’s hard for you to be grounded in reality and figure out what’s true. You might even feel like your intuition is simply missing when it comes to relationships.

A lack of boundaries is one of the biggest issues with this Venus square Pluto placement. When you’re in a relationship, you don’t know how to differentiate between the feelings of your partner and your own emotions. You are either overly dependent or attract partners who must depend on you.

Venus square Pluto is all about fear. Your terror keeps you from truly going deep, so you manipulate others on a surface level to avoid looking at the things you’re afraid of. Although you desire close bonds, you also feel extremely vulnerable when things get too intimate. 

Typically, your relationships get quite heated. They can be full of anger, fighting, power struggles, control, and manipulation. You’re never quite satisfied with your relationships, but Venus square Pluto makes it hard to know what you do want. Both sex and love are used as weapons with Venus square Pluto. True intimacy is rare; you may not even know what it is.

You probably love forbidden things or go after forbidden partners, but this is only because you’re substituting the idea of taboo love for true intimacy. You might think that if your partner is obsessed with you then they love you, yet this is not the truth.

Venus square Pluto means that you are either controlling or controlled. You might obsess over your partner, or you find partners who are jealous and obsessive towards you. Sometimes, it’s a bit of both. You need a certain level of intensity in a relationship in order to feel anything, so you may actually think that obsession is good.

It is this very intensity that can bring about positive transformation. Your core self must be transformed through relationships. Fear must turn to love, but this takes a lot of growth. In order to do this work, you must actively be in relationships. This is the only way to bring about the intense transformation that Venus square Pluto demands.

You may fear introspection, but it is necessary to learn. Venus square Pluto takes a long time to transmute. You will have to figure things out one at a time, learning lesson after lesson in relationship. Don’t shy away from pain; instead, learn from it. Dive deep and do everything you can when something difficult happens to figure out how you feel and why.

Eventually, you can have extremely fulfilling relationships, even with Venus square Pluto. You will certainly know a lot more about yourself by the end! With the right partner, after doing the work, you can see into your partner’s soul and been seen for who you truly are.

With Venus square Pluto, you must learn to love yourself before you can learn to love others. You must also figure out how to be vulnerable. Once you have a sense of self-worth, you will find that vulnerability is much easier. Work on your core self and develop your own sense of self. You will then have your own mind and intuition as the basis of any relationship.

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