In astrology, Black Moon Lilith is one of the coolest points. We all know Lilith, whether from mythology or because she popped up as a character in our favorite supernatural shows/books, but there isn’t much concrete information about Lilith when it comes to astrology.
One thing is always certain: Lilith is powerful. Even in astrology, I’ve found this to be 100% true.
Regardless of the sign that she’s in, Lilith has both positive and negative qualities in the chart. Your Lilith shows how you can become obsessive, but also reveals your secret desires that aren’t necessarily bad. In fact, Lilith in astrology can be quite empowering for anyone, not just women.
I’ll go over every single Lilith placement by sign and house in this post, but first I want to give you a small bit of background on Lilith so you know what you’re dealing with.
Who Is Lilith In Astrology?
There are so many myths that have some variation of Lilith in them. It can be hard to figure out what the original myth was or to trace Lilith to her origins.
The most popular myth describes Lilith as the first wife to Adam in the garden of Eden. Lilith and Adam were made of the same substance, so she wasn’t subservient to him. They disagreed on many things; Adam wanted to dominate over Lilith (both in everyday life and sexually) and Lilith refused to let him.
Lilith became enraged and screamed out God’s name, then she disappeared voluntarily (or was exiled, depending on the version) and lived in a cave near the Red Sea. According to some texts, the caves were filled with demons. Lilith bread with them, thus she is known as the mother of demons. The myth says that Lilith had hundreds of children within a week or so.
Adam appealed to God who sent three angels to try and convince Lilith to return. Some legends say that one of these angels was Lucifer, who fell in love with Lilith.
The angels threatened to kill 100 of her children a day, but she still refused to return, so God created Eve out of Adam’s rib. Even was a much “better” helpmate, but her creation also endowed the masculine with power over the feminine, because she was subservient to Adam.
Some legends say that Lilith goes about slaying human babies as her revenge against the angels and God who continuously kill her children. In most Jewish cultures, Lilith was known as a demon, but the ancient Babylonians actually revered her as a goddess of the feminine. In those texts, she is seen as powerful and protective.
Wherever Lilith pops up in mythology, you will almost always find the theme of the patriarchy forcing women into submission. Originally, it wasn’t meant to be political at all. Instead, Lilith represents the power within us that can never be snuffed out, regardless of what’s happening in the world.
In astrology, Lilith is the wild feminine sign. She shows many different elements that the traditional planets don’t encompass. Lilith wasn’t used in traditional astrology, but I personally think that’s because the qualities that Lilith brings weren’t recognized until very recently.
There are a few different Lilith “points” (Dark Moon Lilith and Black Moon Lilith) used in astrology, as well as a Lilith asteroid.
The most common point to look at is Black Moon Lilith; I also find it to be the most accurate. Most astrology software will only show you Black Moon Lilith. Dark Moon Lilith and the Lilith asteroid certainly have their uses, but I find them to be much more limited in terms of what they can show.
For example, the asteroid Lilith tends to show how an individual expresses activism. I feel that Black Moon Lilith is a much better indicator of the wild feminine as well as the themes of shame, repression, primal instincts, and rejection. Black Moon Lilith shows a well-rounded, holistic view of Lilith-like qualities in your life.
For the purposes of this blog post, I’ll refer to Black Moon Lilith strictly as Lilith from here on. If you’re interested in asteroid Lilith or Dark Moon Lilith then stay tuned – I will write another post about these astrology points in the future!
What Will Your Black Moon Lilith Astrology Sign Show?
Lilith will show you the animal instincts that you repress as well as where you feel shame. She governs sexuality in the deep, unconscious sense. She will also show the area of life where you have experienced rejection, either from the self or from others.
Sometimes, there is a binging and purging cycle where Lilith is concerned; how you do this will show through the Lilith astrology sign and house where the point sits.
Generally, Lilith shows areas where you struggle and feel like you just can’t win. Some of these unconscious conflicts will define much of your life.
Lilith is also pretty sexual in nature, so this placement can show what you want during sex, although you might repress these desires, and your secret fantasies.
I find that Lilith is usually karmic, so these qualities are with us for life. There are ways to work with Lilith and bring out the empowering qualities of the sign without becoming self-destructive, but recognize that many of these issues probably stem from past lives.
Lilith in the signs is just as important as Lilith in the houses. I find that reading each description separately then fitting the pieces together (almost like a puzzle) can help you figure out your Lilith sun.
Unlike your Venus or Mars, Lilith is really complex and specific to the individual. Don’t worry if every piece doesn’t make sense – figure out what does work for you and go from there. Symbolism is always important when you’re working with Lilith.
Related Posts:
- Pallas Astrology: How You Solve Problems
- Juno Astrology: What You Need For a Relationship to Last
- Juno Astrology Aspects In Synastry
Black Moon Lilith Astrology Through the Signs:
Keep in mind that because you have an individual chart, it’s totally OK if not every part of these descriptions fits. I put in info for all parts of each sign, so you’ll have to see which sentences fit with your chart (based on house and aspects).
Lilith in the signs is important, but I find that Lilith in the houses (below) is equally important. I recommend that you read both descriptions and see how they can fit together into your life. It can take some time to piece together but there is always some common ground between the sign and the house that Lilith is in.
Here are my personal definitions for Lilith in the signs.
Lilith In Aries:
If you have Lilith in Aries, you have trouble properly asserting yourself. You have a fear of taking the lead or becoming a commander, yet you also possess a strong, deep desire to do so.
This often manifests as someone who forces others to follow them and takes power as much as possible, or alternatively as someone who gives up their power to others.
Sometimes, there is a back and forth between these two extremes. You might have trouble balancing leadership and power. It can be hard for you to figure out when it’s appropriate to exert yourself and when you should let others take control.
Impulse control can be an issue for those with Lilith in Aries. Sometimes you have too much impulse control and don’t act when you should, but other times you show no restraint.
The goal is to develop personal power that comes from within. True personal power can never be taken away or extinguished.
With Lilith in Aries, you believe that power comes from outside of you. The goal is to find your power within; it has always been there. No one can take it from you. In fact, the only real power you have is already inside of you.
Lilith In Taurus:
Lilith in Taurus is all about possessions and status. Typically, you have a deep seated desire for things. There are a few ways that this desire can manifest in your life.
Firstly, you might do your absolute best to accumulate massive amounts of possessions, wealth, and status. This could be a singularly focused goal and you’ll stop at nothing to achieve it.
Alternatively, you might turn away completely from possessions and status, and renounce all “earthly” things as bad.
Individuals with Lilith in Taurus sometimes swing back and forth between these two extremes or get stuck on one end of the spectrum. Regardless of how your desires manifest, you will never feel truly satisfied or sated.
More than any other placement, Lilith in Taurus has the potential for extremism; many powerful people have this placement.
Of course, power can be used in many different ways, so this isn’t necessarily good or bad. Some of the best world leaders have had Lilith in Taurus as well as some of the most destructive in history.
You might have a suppressed sex drive or be unexpressive during sex. With Taurus in Lilith, you’re probably extremely contained; the body isn’t very expressive.
It’s easy for those with Lilith in Taurus to get stuck in the superficial side of the Taurus sign. At its best, Taurus is earthly sensuality that flows, but with Lilith in Taurus, it can feel like this flow is blocked.
If you have Black Moon Lilith in Taurus, you need to connect with the earth and with your roots. It can even be helpful to connect with the root chakra, which is often unbalanced.
The goal is to learn how to transmit the need for possessions or status to the higher plane, where Taurus is connected to all things. You will then understand how to make energy flow and will have an easier time getting what you want.
Initially, you try to force the energy through in order to cover up your deep shame. However, Lilith in Taurus can be really wonderful if you’re able to create an energetic flow. To do this, you must first work through your unconscious shame that the placement brings.
Lilith In Gemini:
If you have Black Moon Lilith in Gemini, you can be stunted in the way you speak or express yourself. There is usually some type of issue with communication whether it’s in groups, in one-on-one conversations, or spiritual communication with your guides.
You may be stuck in your own head with Lilith in Gemini, especially during sex. It can be hard for you to connect to your body. I find that these types often like wordplay and fun, expressive sexual play, but they do need to feel connected to their partner and want to know that their partner sees them.
On the darker side, you can have an intense dual nature with Lilith in Gemini. You can develop mental illness or be attracted to those who have mental illness. In fact, you may be drawn towards partners who have a bit of a “crazy” side, because this is what you stuff down in your own psyche.
Connecting to your senses, to nature, and to your animal instincts can help to balance out the duality found with Black Moon Lilith in Gemini. You’re super smart naturally, but this can be difficult for your because your mind works at warped speed. You may even come off as slightly erratic.
This will be a lifelong struggle, but there are positives that you wouldn’t have without Lilith in Gemini. You will need to learn to become more grounded, but you are blessed to have such a sharp, acute mind.
Related: Earth Sign Astrology | Earth Signs vs. Sun Signs In The Birth Chart
Lilith In Cancer:
Black Moon Lilith in Cancer almost always has to do with mother issues, or at least some sort of problem with the nurture that the child received. If you have Lilith in Cancer, you were shamed for your emotions at some point.
Sometimes the Lilith in Cancer individual has a scary past (such as losing a parent, an abusive childhood, etc.), while other folks just had a general lack of traditional nurture in childhood.
Now, out of fear, you might keep these emotions stuffed way down or avoid emotional situations altogether so that others don’t notice you even have feelings.
Most individuals with Lilith in Cancer try to stuff their emotions but aren’t very successful, so either the emotions come out sideways. The person might become depressed or develop escapist behaviors like addictions.
Sometimes, the Lilith in Cancer individual can simultaneously become needy of partners, friends, or even their parents. They are trying to make up for what they feel was a lack of nurture.
Sex for these individuals may feel disconnected and cold until they can embrace their emotional nature. It’s hard for them to connect with a partner on a deep level.
The “wildness” of Black Moon Lilith shows through emotions for Lilith in Cancer people, so they feel the need to try and shut them off their feelings, but then they are disconnect from the universe and from All That Is.
The healing path for those with Lilith in Cancer is to acknowledge, feel, and then release their emotions in a healthy manner.
The goal for someone with Black Moon Lilith in Cancer is to be present and really feel themselves in the moment without fear or shame.
The person needs to have the courage to access and feel these emotions, and respond with his/her whole being in the moment – to be present and to feel. These people can have trouble letting go of a scary or sad past.
Lilith In Leo:
Black Moon Lilith in Leo is all about the desire to be admired. You have a deep need for glory or esteem from others. This craving might feel shameful to you and may be something you try to hide, or instead you might go to any lengths to get fame and approval.
Generally, Lilith in Leo will show itself in one of two ways.
1. You are attracted to powerful people and seek admiration from them. For example, you mind find yourself in a relationship with someone who you consider to be influential or important, even in your group of friends or family circle (if not extremely publicly).
You find that it is safer to be with someone important rather than gain importance yourself, which feels shameful. Subconsciously, you feel that if powerful people notice you, this must mean that you’re important, too.
2. Alternatively, you seek power or influence for yourself. You desire to show off and be noticed, but you also have a deep fear of being criticized. You feel so unremarkable inside that you must make yourself appear important to others by any means possible.
Some very famous individuals and politicians have Lilith in Leo. It isn’t necessarily a bad placement and can give you the motivation that you need to achieve fame, but if the ego becomes too involved then it can turn unfavorable.
Regardless of how Black Moon Lilith in Leo is expressed, this Lilith astrology placement is all about what others think of you and about your concern over how the world and the masses see you.
At its worst, Lilith and Leo can cause either a major lack of self-esteem and even mental illness or narcissism.
At its best, the individual Lilith in Leo wants to be admired for deserving something. When you transmute this energy, you won’t feel shame about your desire to be admired or have an unhealthy ego, but will try to become someone who is worthy of esteem.
Lilith In Virgo:
If you have Lilith in Virgo, you have issues with perfection. You feel a deep sense of shame that in some area (usually the area of the house that your Lilith astrology sign is in), you aren’t perfect. You might even feel like you have a deep dark flaw in this area.
To try and dispose of these feelings, you will react one of two ways.
You might try to be perfect but never quite reach the purity that you seek, which only deepens your sense of shame at being flawed.
Alternatively, you give up on tasks halfway through (because you know you can never hide your flaw) and feel that there’s no point in even trying. You may do some combination of both or swing back and forth between the two extremes.
Sexually, those with Lilith in virgo are either repressed, cold, and “virginal,” or they’re obsessed with being good and perfect in bed. They might struggle to understand that they should derive satisfaction from sexual acts, too. They may think only of pleasing their partner.
Lilith in Virgo stems from a lack of confidence in the self and a deep-seated belief that something about the self is fundamentally wrong. To heal this way of thinking, you’ll need to accept that perfection is impossible; realize that the Universe is imperfect for a reason. Learn to find the perfect in imperfection and to accept yourself as you are.
Lilith In Libra:
I find that Lilith in Libra expresses itself in one of two ways.
If you have Lilith in Libra, you may run into relationship issues. You probably have an unconscious need to have a partnership, but something might block you from this, whether it’s society, your parents, or your own shame about that fact that you want a partnership.
Black Moon Lilith in Libra, especially in the relationship sense, is a difficult placement to heal. It is a lifelong lesson to learn how to be strong on your own yet coexist in a partnership, but this is what you need to evolve your Lilith astrology sign.
The key is for you to learn how to be in healthy relationships without sacrificing yourself, feeling guilty, or avoiding things altogether when it gets tough to handle.
Alternatively, you have a need to please others, but may sacrifice yourself to do it. You swing back and forth between trying to indulge others and satisfy yourself. You might feel a sense of constant guilt that you haven’t done enough to help other people. Other times, you might all but ignore the plight of others in order to please yourself.
In this scenario, you need to work on your Black Moon Lilith in Libra in order to find the middle ground between helping others and feeling satisfied with your own actions.
Related: Moon Transits: How the Moon Affects You On A Daily Basis
Lilith In Scorpio:
Lilith in Scorpio is a powerful but potentially self-destructive placement. With Lilith in Scorpio, you have a strong energy or magnetism that draws others in. This smoldering energy is easily recognizable by people around you.
You generally hunger for something deeper, whether this is a more profound relationship or more knowledgable spiritual state. Look to the house Lilith sits in to see where you always feel less than satisfied.
With Lilith in Scorpio, you may have a tendency to self-destruct; you can easily get so trapped in past negative traumas that you start to feel like you’re drowning in life. It’s hard for you to escape patterns once you begin them.
In the darkest moments, you may have a tendency towards revenge. Black Moon Lilith in Scorpio definitely knows how to hold a grudge.
To transmute Lilith in Scorpio into positive energy, you will want to work on breaking patterns of self-destruction and caring for yourself. You will need to let go of your attachments to things (as you have a tendency to get over-attached) and to learn how to be okay with whatever comes your way, without going to a dark place.
The lesson for Lilith in Scorpio is to learn the value of trust in the Universe.
Related: Black Moon Lilith Aspects In Synastry
Lilith In Sagittarius:
If you have Lilith in Sagittarius, you probably love living in excess. In some manner, you like to go overboard and don’t care about the consequences. You like to push your boundaries.
In Sagittarius, Black Moon Lilith can feel compelled to either travel quite a bit or to try new, exciting, dangerous activities. These folks aren’t content with ordinary experiences. They can feel a deep sense of restlessness that they can never quench.
At your core with Lilith in Sagittarius, you need to be independent. This can manifest in a lot of different ways (depending on the house and aspects) but can cause problems in work, relationships, etc. because this need is so intense.
You also want to be somewhat independent sexually and at the very least need a partner who is willing to try all types of new stuff. Connection probably isn’t as important to you as getting frisky in different places, trying new games, etc.
The path to healing Lilith in Sagittarius is to learn the value of independence without feeling constricted by relationships. Working through the fear of being tied down is a good place to begin.
With Black Moon Lilith in Sagittarius, you have a false fear of constriction. You try to avoid dealing with it, but in order to be successful and emotionally stable, you must turn around and look at the thing you’re afraid of.
Lilith In Capricorn:
If you have Lilith in Capricorn, you have a deep fear of failure. You need to be successful in some area (look to the house) and feel that you will be annihilated if you’re not.
Those with Lilith in Capricorn have a strong sense of responsibility. If you do fail, you feel responsible to others and quite literally can’t live with your failure. Your sense of duty can be way overboard, even if this isn’t something you express to others. You can start to feel like a slave to your own self-imposed duties.
If you do experience defeat with Lilith in Capricorn, you can experience strong cognitive dissonance and have a complete breakdown. You are, however, good at getting back up on your feet after you’ve fallen.
Sexually, those with Black Moon Lilith in Capricorn are either more on the dominant side or a bit repressed and cold. Alternatively, they can feel that they have a responsibility to create a fulfilling sexual encounter for others, but this can become a burden as well.
Lilith in Capricorn is all about learning to take responsibility for yourself, first. The weight of the world doesn’t need to be on your shoulders.
Lilith In Aquarius:
With Lilith in Aquarius, you want to be part of the crowd but simultaneously feel ashamed for even trying. You never quite fit in; it is your deepest desire to belong in a group, but it often feels impossible.
It is a basic human need to want companionship, so it’s not crazy that you want to fit in. However, with Black Moon Lilith in Aquarius, you do possess qualities that make you intrinsically different.
In fact, you may sometimes feel like an alien on this planet. You’re often ashamed of these qualities that make you stand apart.
The path to healing Lilith in Aquarius is to find the benefits in these unique qualities and to recognize that you are different for a reason. It can also be helpful to find likeminded individuals. In this way, you can be different together.
Be careful that, with Lilith in Aquarius, you don’t spend time chasing people who want you to conform. Accept your differences and then find friends who do the same.
Lilith In Pisces:
In Pisces, Lilith has trouble with balance. She causes you to swing from one extreme to the next with no middle ground and nowhere solid to stand.
I find that Lilith in Pisces wants to escape because she isn’t content with reality, usually for some good reasons that stem from childhood and/or past life trauma. Black Moon Lilith in Pisces prefers fantasy over reality.
Sometimes, the trauma that causes this escapism seems “minor” on the surface but caused a huge rift within your core self. If you have Lilith in Pisces, never assume that any trauma is minor to you, because everything that happens to you is important.
Lilith in Pisces has a cycle of binging and purging, thought not necessarily with eating. This cycle can occur with food, but also with alcohol, drugs, tattoos, fantasies, music, recognition, winning, and just about anything else that can be done to the extreme.
This cycle, and the Lilith in Pisces energy in general, can create a cloud of depression, anxiety/nervous energy, or other mental illnesses.
A key blocker in empowering Lilith in Pisces is the fact that many people with this placement remain in denial over these issues because they are too painful to face. Instead, they believe that it’s better to continue with their fantasies or addictions, even though this hurts them in the long run.
The key with Black Moon Lilith in Pisces is to learn moderation and self-empowerment. Many of these individuals benefit from therapy to help them see who they are rather than trying to be someone else, but much of this work has to be done internally, too.
Those with Lilith in Pisces need to learn to love themselves and their own life rather than trying to escape it someone. There is beauty in every life and every area on Earth, but Lilith in Pisces creates a block so that the individual can’t see this.
The first step is to overcome this barrier in order to live an authentic existence. These folks need to first draw a line between reality and fantasy, then work to find what’s beautiful about their own reality.
Lilith Through the Houses
Unlike other planets, Lilith changes a lot depending on what house she’s in. I recommend putting equal weight on the sign and the house. Sometimes it can even be helpful to study the house your Lilith astrology sign is in first, then flavor that description according to the sign.
Lilith In The 1st House:
In the 1st house, Lilith is pretty apparent to everyone else. It’s hard for you to hide what you desire, even if you feel ashamed about it, and it bleeds through in almost every area of your life.
You might feel dissatisfied no matter what, especially in the areas of your Lilith astrology sign. For example, with Lilith in Taurus, you’re constantly dissatisfied with your home, your possessions, or your image.
Lilith in the 1st house is extremely personal. She may start to feel like she is a critical part of who you are, even if there are some negative feelings associated with these qualities. You may live with a recurrent sense of shame that you can’t quite identify.
Sometimes (not always), Lilith in the 1st house can cause body issues. A great example of someone with Lilith in the 1st house is Marilyn Monroe, whose Lilith in Leo also sat in her 1st house. She felt intense shame about herself, her personality, her looks, etc., yet she needed to be affirmed by other people in order to appease her Lilith astrology sign.
The 1st house is an area that governs our reactions rather than our intellect or logic. For this reason, it can be especially difficult to work with Lilith in the 1st house, because she is reactionary and subconscious.
The idea is always to transmute Lilith to her highest form rather than the lower base instincts that cause us pain. With Lilith in the 1st house, examine every single push and action you take that is Lilith-based. Dig deeper and look for your root motivation rather than trying to appease yourself in the moment to get rid of the feelings of shame.
For example, someone with Lilith in Taurus might constantly buy things or try to live up to a certain image because they feel less-than without material items. This individual will want to examine their childhood and past lives to see where this idea came from and to heal the inner self. This is the path to a healthy, actualized Lilith.
Lilith In The 2nd House:
In the second house, Lilith is all about the darker impulses concerning money, possessions, survival, or image. You might be obsessed with one of these things and have trouble seeing the bigger picture.
Much of this fixation comes from fear. To avoid dealing with Lilith in the 2nd house (which usually stems from the idea that you are nothing or have nothing/no security), you try even harder to achieve things.
Others rejected you in some way that deeply injured you, and in your mind, the only way to “beat” that rejection (that now lives within you) is to show them how wrong they were. Whether this rejection happened in a past life or in this life doesn’t matter; the outcome is the same.
You have a fear of failing, of being left with nothing, or of being no one, but the cause for the fear lives within you. If you truly accepted yourself, you wouldn’t need to live in fear of others seeing what you lack, or think you lack. The path to healing Lilith in the 2nd house is self-acceptance, self-love, and inner child work.
There is nothing wrong with desiring material objects, but everything is good in moderation. When Lilith in the 2nd house gets out of control, she can quickly cause obsession. The goal is to keep Lilith in check while still celebrating her by achieving authentic success that feels right.
Lilith In The 3rd House:
With Lilith in the 3rd house, you went through experiences that created a wound. This was when you were open to the world and before you were guarded, though you now have strong walls up.
This wound was created in childhood and had to do with communication or truth. The incident may have revolved around writing, speaking, social anxiety, learning disabilities, or a disagreement about what’s true and what’s false. You are now guarded around how you communicate.
You might stay silent in social situations, or maybe you mold yourself to what you believe others want to see and hear. In some way, your communication is inauthentic. You sensor yourself due to fear of judgment and even punishment.
The healing path is to begin interacting with the environment in a natural, authentic way, instead of in a way that you think others want you to act.
As you heal Lilith in the 3rd house, you’ll come to learn that we can all have different truths and yet they can all be real. Focus on interacting with nature and with energy rather than just verbally with others. Use the words that you want and speak what comes naturally to you.
Lilith In The 4th House:
If you have Lilith in the 4th house, you’ll find that she manifests the most in early childhood, home life, family, and your relationship with your parents.
Your parents may not have created the issues that Lilith causes, but they probably didn’t know how to handle her within you. Therefore, you either suppressed Lilith because you were taught that showing her is wrong, or you were unable to suppress Lilith and felt that you were rejected because of the Lilith astrology placement.
A lot of times, Lilith in the 4th house has to do with the shame that you feel within yourself, and most especially the self-disgust that you felt as a child. Even though you’re older, these feelings never leave you.
Look to the sign that Lilith is in to see what type of shame you felt and how it manifested. Lilith in the 4th house most especially needs to be healed, because it is carried with you in almost every action until you address it.
Inner child work is crucial to heal Lilith in the 4th house, as is finding love and forgiveness for yourself. This placement in particular may take some time to heal.
Lilith In The 5th House:
With Lilith in the 5th house, you probably had some trauma surrounding your friends and/or peers during childhood. You were shamed for something in youth (the way you played, the way you looked, etc.).
You probably had some Lilith themes in your play as a child, and this was deemed bad or taboo by society, especially other children and their parents. You were told that you were socially inappropriate.
These folks are often flashy, expressive, or futuristic, but it is before their time and so they are rejected by society.
The rejection creates a deep shame that is expressed in one of two ways:
First, you could express your Lilith more and obsessively show off Lilith qualities to others. The shame makes you angrily flaunt all of the intrinsically good qualities that you feel you have, but you still don’t accept them within you. This certainly brings attention to Lilith but it doesn’t heal her within.
Alternatively, you could repress the qualities and try to be “normal.” Sometimes, you might live a double life, while other times you try to pretend that these Lilith in the 5th house qualities don’t exist, even to yourself. Over time, the pressure inside you builds will probably be released all at once in a blow up. You might also feel empty, as though an essential piece of who you are is missing.
Sometimes there are issues with children when you have Lilith in the 5th house. The same qualities that make you an outcast in society can either cause you to not have children or cause issues with your children.
The path to healing Lilith in the 5th house isn’t to show off or to repress Lilith. Instead, the work is to shift the focus off of others and onto the self, even if this isn’t culturally acceptable. Find a way to be your authentic self and feel good about yourself. Focus on you before worrying about others.
If this isn’t possible, then in some cases you might need to leave your family or community to find a place in the world where you can be at peace within yourself. Lilith in the 5th house has many ties to Lilith in the myth who chose to leave Adam and live in exile rather than pretend to be someone she wasn’t.
The path is not really to show others anything. It is to shift the focus off others onto the self and self expression through authentic means, even if it isn’t culturally fit. It is not doing this in a way to stick it to others, but in an authentic version of serving the self.
Lilith In The 6th House:
In the 6th house, Lilith can have a lot to do with mentors, whether this means teachers, parents, friends’ parents, bosses, or other authorities in the position of mentorship. If you have Lilith in the 6th house, the way that you accomplish tasks might not always line up with what your mentors and what society consider to be the “correct” way to do things.
You might have a different way of going about things and are probably scolded for that. This can show up in school, in your professional life, participating in hobbies, etc. The lesson is to honor your own individual way of doing things, even if others don’t appreciate it, and to do what feels right to you.
Alternatively, if this doesn’t fit, then you may have instead adopted a mentality of servitude or slavery in order to survive in the past (whether this means in childhood or in a past life). You get hung up on what you feel you “should” do and have trouble finding your own inner voice when it comes to day-to-day, regular life. You struggle with what other people think and want you to do versus what you feel in your gut.
Similarly, the lesson is to embrace Lilith and focus on what feels right for you. Lilith is different and is often an outcast because she followers her heart, and this is what you must learn to do. The Universe will send you small lessons each day to help you build the groundwork to follow your gut instincts rather than the voice of others or of your “conscience.
Lilith In The 7th House:
In the 7th house, Lilith represents all the qualities that you try to suppress. More than any other placement, you might have trouble seeing the qualities of your Lilith astrology sign in yourself.
You look for a partner who does have the qualities of your Lilith astrology since because with Lilith in the 7th house, you don’t know how to express these qualities for yourself. You might see some of the qualities in you, but most are suppressed. There is a part of yourself that you’re not owning and using to its fullest potential.
With Lilith in the 7th house, you’re bound to end up in a relationship that has a lot of the qualities of your Lilith sign and a vague Lilith-like energy. The relationship might be taboo, on-again-off-again, or obsessive.
The key is not to avoid these relationships, but to own your Lilith astrology sign along-with your partner. You attract partners who embody your Lilith sign because they can teach you how to express it; you already have everything you need to do so, you just need practice.
At first, this may be difficult and may cause difficult relationships or intense break-ups, but over time these qualities can actually be very beneficial to you.
Lilith In The 8th House:
With Lilith in the 8th house, you experienced some sort of trauma or pain either early in your life or in a past life. This is a very intense placement caused by an extreme wound.
This trauma creates a profound fear. You might feel like you’re always running from fear with Lilith in the 8th house. Your Lilith astrology sign will clarify more about what this fear is and how it was created.
This fear will cause you to control, whether this means you try to control others, your surroundings, or your own mind. You believe that control will stop the fear from existing, but unfortunately this strategy doesn’t work longterm. If you don’t deal with your trauma, the fear will only grow stronger.
Black Moon Lilith in the 8th house is a very transformative placement. Most people with Lilith in the 8th house either transform and transcend or self-destruct.
The lesson is to learn how to trust, not in others, but in the Universe. You only need control when you believe that the Universe doesn’t have your back. Figure out what your fear is and what your trauma is, then look at what you learned from the trauma. Why did the Universe allow this to happen? Everything is always for your highest purpose.
Oddly enough, I find that those with Lilith in the 8th house sometimes have the potential to make money through slightly taboo ways. Be careful of staying on the right side of the law and go with your gut if this happens to fit.
Those with Lilith in the 8th house are super deep people and their relationships have a crazy amount of depth. It’s a wonderful placement if you’re able to transcend and work through the fear to transmit Lilith for good.
Lilith In The 9th House:
If you have Lilith in the 9th house, you think differently about certain topics (religion, philosophy, culture, higher education, sexuality, etc.) but are not able to express yourself in order to fit into society.
Your Lilith makes you feel different because she doesn’t agree with society about something; this will reflect more specifically based on what sign your Lilith is.
You may try to conform to society despite your Lilith in the 9th house and hide your differences, or you might flaunt your differences due to insecurity and flaunt your Lilith, but at your core you don’t accept yourself with your differences.
The path to healing is to first figure out where you think differently and why, then work to accept yourself as you are and trust that there is a good reason for these differences.
Lilith In The 10th House:
Lilith in the 10th house is all about your public image. Your public self (meaning even the self you show to acquaintances) carries the energy of Lilith that you feel the need to hide.
You probably want to be accepted by the public but the only way to do that is to suppress Lilith. Your Lilith astrology sign makes you different from others in a key way that might make others uncomfortable, yet Lilith is a part of who you are.
For some people, Lilith in the 10th house can make it difficult to find a long-term career that satisfies them. some individuals will stay with one job for a long time even though it doesn’t make them happy and they will suppress Lilith to do so, while others might jump from job to job, searching for an occupation that feels right.
It isn’t until you access Lilith when you’ll find peace, both in your career and with your public image. Do you choose to honor yourself and Lilith even if it makes you unpopular, or would you rather do what society believes is right and be approved of?
The key is to recognize that the reactions of others (especially to your Lilith sign) are based on them and their natal charts, not on you or any flaw you feel you possess.
To heal Lilith, commit to knowing yourself just as you are. Learn about your deepest thoughts and work on how you approve of yourself, regardless of what your public image is.
Lilith In The 11th House:
With Lilith in the 11th house, you are continuously rejected from groups in some way, especially at a young age. You have a nagging feeling that you never quite fit in, whether with official organizations or unofficial friend groups.
You think or behave differently then groups in society expect from you. Look to the sign that your Lilith astrology sign is in to determine how these differences present themselves.
With Lilith in the 11th house, you have a deep need to be accepted, even though it almost never happens. You feel a sense of shame that you can’t just seem to fit in.
You may alternate between desperately wanting (and trying) to fit in, and giving up altogether or swearing off groups and friends. You may only express one of these reactions. Regardless, the core feeling is the same.
What you need to realize is that others don’t dislike you because of your Lilith in the 11th house. Instead, they are afraid of the differences that you present. With this Lilith astrology placement, you will realize that the Universe has gifted you a unique set of gifts for a reason.
The path to healing Lilith in the 11th house involves delving into your differences instead of being ashamed by them and figuring out why you are different, then offering your unique gifts to the world.
In the beginning, you are unconsciously drawn to groups who won’t accept you based on your Lilith, but as you work to accept these Lilith qualities in yourself, you will start to find groups of people who accept you for exactly who you are. The trick is that you must first accept yourself.
Lilith In The 12th House:
In the 12th house, Lilith is almost completely hidden from view. This means that either others don’t realize you have any issue with Lilith at all, or you’re completely blocked from expressing Lilith’s qualities.
For example, if you have Lilith in Leo in the 12th house (which would typically mean an attraction to fame and attention), this might be something you feel within yourself but never act on. It’s completely hidden from even people who know you well.
Alternatively, you might be totally blocked from accessing the qualities of the sign. For example, if you have Lilith in Taurus in the 12th house, you might have no ability to acquire things or money, or absolutely no knowledge of how to successfully live in the material world.
Sex with Lilith in the 12th house is usually difficult because the sign is buried so deeply in the unconscious mind. You will probably have trouble understanding the meaning and purpose of sexual activity until you access Lilith and heal her.
Lilith in the 12th house can feel especially wild and uncontrollable. She is quite literally our deepest instinct and is totally hidden in the unconscious mind when she sits in the 12th house.
There is often a deep sense of shame surrounding this Lilith. The reason for this is that you probably really were made fun of for your Lilith astrology sign at some point, especially when she sits in the 12th. The fear of this Lilith sign is completely valid.
I find that Lilith in the 12th house is usually something that comes from past lives, not only from childhood. It’s a harder placement to heal because it has been with you for so long. Some choose to avoid Lilith or engage in escapist 12th house behaviors, while others choose to heal her.
The way to heal Lilith in the 12th is to connect with the unconscious mind through the body. Our bodies almost always tell us when something is wrong (through sickness, anxiety, sleepiness, etc.) and will be especially telling when your Lilith is acting up. Once you’ve identified that something is off, dig deeper into Lilith and figure out exactly what is causing you shame.
Spending time in nature is another great way to heal Lilith in the 12th house. She can be unbalanced, so grounding and earthing can be a wonderful starting point to delve into Lilith.
Where to Learn More About Lilith
There’s very little accurate information out there on Lilith. I’m hoping that more books will be written and more professional astrologers will devote time and attention to Lilith, but until then we have to work with what we’ve got.
Because Lilith is so undiscovered, a lot of the work will revolve around you figuring out what you think she is and looking at what definitions resonate with you.
Here are some books I recommend if you want to deepen your understanding of Lilith:
